Stigma | Trans+ Sexual Wellbeing

People can be stigmatised for many different things. Within the LGBTQ+ community, stigma is often associated with sexual and gender identity, including the experiences of trans and non-binary people, as well as HIV and sexual health. Trans people may face stigma related to their gender identity, gender expression, use of pronouns, medical transition, or for living  openly as themsevles. However, stigma, can also relate to many other aspects of identity, such as ethnicity, queerness and mental health.

Stigma is when people hold negative attitudes or prejudices about a distinguishing characteristic, whether that be gender, sexuality, gender identity, race, religion, mental health or sexual health. For trans people, this can include misgendering, invasive or uncomfortable questions about their bodies, assumptions about their sexuality, exclusion from services, or discrimination in healthcare and relationships.  Stigma can also become internal, leading to self-imposed feelings of shame, fear or self-doubt.  

Experiencing stigma is never your fault. Feeling hurt, frustrated or exhausted by it is a completely normal response to being treated unfairly. 

How can stigma impact us?

Stigma doesn’t just affect how we feel day-to-day — it can shape how safe we feel in our bodies, how we experience intimacy, and whether we feel confident accessing sexual health support. 

The effects of stigma  affects us in many different ways, andcan impact both mental wellbeing and sexual wellbeing It can: 

• make us anxious or depressed 

• make us isolated or lonely 

• impact our self-esteem 

• make us question our self-worth 

• make us disengage from relationships, both romantic and friendship 

• impact our sex life negatively 

• make us engage in sexual relationships in unhealthy ways 

• make us feel shame 

• create fear around accessing healthcare, including sexual health services 

• make us feel unsafe or hyperaware in public spaces. 

For trans people, stigma may also lead to avoiding dating, intimacy, or sexual health clinics due to fear of being judged, misgendered, or misunderstood. Experiences of discrimination in healthcare can reduce trust in professionals, which may impact both mental and sexual wellbeing. 

Many trans people describe feeling like they have to “prepare themselves” emotionally before appointments or new relationships. That emotional labour is real — and it can take a toll. 

External stigma can easily become an internal struggle, affecting how we feel about ourselves, our bodies and our relationships. 

How can we deal with the impact of stigma? 

You can’t control other people’s behaviour, but you can take steps to protect your wellbeing and build supportive spaces around you. 

While stigmatising behaviours can feel like a big obstacle, there are things we can do to lessen its impact on us: 

Talk to friends. By sharing our experiences we can lessen the burden on ourselves. Allow them to support you, have your back and empathise with your experiences. It will make your journey easier. If you are trans, having friends who respect your name and pronouns and affirm your identity can be protective for your wellbeing. 

Talk to family. If you feel comfortable, share your experiences with family members. If the stigma you face is based on ethnicity, sexuality, or gender identity, talking to a family member who has a similar lived experience might help you to navigate the negativity. For trans people, supportive family relationships can significantly reduce feelings of isolation. 

Talk to peers. Find someone with the same lived experience as you e.g. if you are struggling with HIV stigma, talk to others online or through community and support groups who have been, or who are, going through the same thing. If you are trans or questioning your gender identity, connecting with other trans people can help normalise your experiences and reduce shame. The LGBT HERO Forums provide a safe anonymous space to seek peer support and ask questions, as well as our Trans+ HangOuts. 

Talk to a therapist or counsellor. Professional support is recommended if you’re finding it all a bit too much. Look for therapists who are LGBTQ+ affirmative and, if relevant, experienced in supporting trans clients, so you can speak openly without fear of judgement. 

Look after your sexual health. Try not to let the impact of stigma have a physical effect on your health. Regular testing and knowing your status will give you peace of mind. Trans people may sometimes need to advocate for inclusive and respectful care, but you deserve competent and affirming sexual health support. It’s okay to ask questions, request different staff, or take someone with you if it helps you feel safer.